WOOHOO! KASH PATEL SUES THE ATLANTIC FOR DEFAMATION – THIS IS GONNA BE FUN! (DOCUMENT INCLUDED)

Kash Patel just filed a lawsuit against The Atlantic and journalist Sarah Fitzpatrick for defamation, for talking about Patel’s “excessive drinking”. You see, Patel maintains that he is the epitome of sobriety and responsible drinking. He also says, and I quote, “…this has not, and has never been, a source of concern across the government.”

Well, that last sentence is certainly true – because this government is run by the twin fraternities of Iota Hava Nother and Tur Na Blindeye.

Before we go any further, a refresher course of Learn a Little Law with Anne is in order:

Defamation is the besmirching the good reputation of someone – this can be either by saying or writing/publishing a defamatory statement. There are two types of defamation: slander, where the defamation is spoken, and libel, where it is written. That the statement is true is *always* a defense to an accusation of defamation. So it means that the person filing a defamation lawsuit has to prove that the alleged defamatory statements were categorically *not true*. Now, that’s for a defamation suit by the average Joe. BUT when you are a public figure you have to not only prove that the statement isn’t true, but you have to *prove* that the statement was made intentionally *with malice*. (Fun fact: in the UK it’s the reverse – the person being sued has to prove the statement was true! Whacky, right?)

In fact, in his lawsuit, in the first paragraph, you will see that Patel says “Defendants published the Article with actual malice”. And to drive the point home, the complaint says ‘malice’ or ‘malicious’ no fewer than *8* times.

But guess what? Proof of malice isn’t like Beetlejuice, Bloody Mary, or, for my fellow geeks, Kibo, you can’t just say it a bunch of times and actual malice will magically appear.

After outlining who are the parties, and why the District Court for the District of Columbia is the proper court in which to have filed this lawsuit, Patel inexplicably goes into a litany of *all of the great things he claims to have done for our country*!!

These include:

“Under Director Patel’s leadership, the FBI has achieved historic law enforcement results, including:

a. the capture of 8 of the FBI’s 10 Most Wanted fugitives (twice as many in this Administration alone as during the entirety of the prior Administration);

b. more than 40,000 violent crime arrests, reflecting a 112% increase in violent crime arrests over 2024, alongside a 20% decrease in homicide rate, a 20% decrease in robberies, and a 10% decrease in aggravated assaults;

c. the disruption of more than 2,000 gangs and criminal enterprises (up 210%)”

And that’s just a, b, and c of a list that goes through k! And it has *exactly nothing* to do with the lawsuit, let alone whether he drinks to excess and it interferes with him doing his job.

What’s more, he then provides another alphabetic list, this time all the way through q(!) of all of the allegedly defamatory statements! So, if you haven’t heard all of the things that he’s been doing while under the influence, you can read them now. 😂

Then he whines that on the day that the Atlantic published the article they contacted the FBI with a request for comment, but “only” two hours ahead of the publication deadline.

Look, if the FBI can’t even respond to a request for comment within two hours, how can we rely on them to respond to a *real emergency* in a timely manner? A whole lot of damage can happen in two hours.

But, in fact, he goes on to say (after the whining), the FBI *did* respond. “FBI OPA, through Assistant Director Williamson, responded before publication that AMG’s claims were “one of the most absurd things I’ve ever read. Completely false at a nearly 100% clip.” Defendants buried this striking language, never reported it, and chose to publish the claims anyway. They included only a generic, truncated denial attributed to Director Patel (“Print it, all false, I’ll see you in court – bring your checkbook”).”

Presumably they should bring their checkbook because Patel expects them to buy the next round.

Now, here’s the thing – the beautiful thing – assuming this lawsuit makes it past the summary judgement stage, discovery is going to be *amazing*. Because this allows the Atlantic to dig into, depose, and disclose every single incident where Patel actually had been drinking and it had a negative impact on something. Because when you’re the director of the FBI you shouldn’t day drink. Or night drink. At least not to excess. (By the way, the classy image of our classy Director of the FBI chugging a beer at the winter Olympics – instead of, you know, protecting our country – has been authenticated as real by many publications, including TMZ and the Daily Beast.)

The only fly in this delightful discovery ointment is that witnesses may be reluctant to disclose what they know because it will get them onto Patel’s enemies list, and with the power of the FBI behind him that can be pretty intimidating.

But all it will take is a couple of people willing to talk.

So, my best guess is that, like other defamation suits from this administration, the suit will either be dropped, settled, or dismissed.

Because the 1st Amendment applies to everyone, not just sober people.

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P.S. If you actually read all the way to the bottom please leave a comment that includes the word “chug”. It will show me that my efforts aren’t in vain and that people actually *do* read these things, and it will drive those who just skim crazy wondering why everyone is talking about chugging! ;~)




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